Friday, August 5, 2011

When ya gotta go, ya gotta go...

To my Grandparents: this post is not for you to read. Well, you're adults, you can read it if you want. But I am about to talk about the genitalia of strangers.

Josh and I like to drive the county roads around here. It's peaceful, gorgeous, and very calming. Except for the fact that at any given moment, you are liable to pass a half-naked German on the side of the road.

Ok, that may be a slight exaggeration. They're not half-naked, but I have seen more weewees than I have cared to see.

Let me explain. If you're driving on the autobahn, there are fewer, but bigger gas station/convenience stores around. If you're from my neck of the woods in Texas, imagine a Buc-ee's (or even a Wawa's if you're from the East Coast), and that's what they tend to have on the freeways here. Toilet rest-areas are also fairly common on the side of the road around here. Now, when you drive on non-Autobahn roads, it's a little harder to find toilets. But, definitely not impossible.

Unfortunately, German drivers don't really feel the need to find the nearest bathroom. Guys (and it's been exclusively guys - I have yet to see a woman's ass shining at me from the side of the road) make no qualms about pulling over anywhere - and I do mean ANYWHERE - to take a tinkle.

I can't tell you the number of times I've seen a guy in mid-stream. Something about it just completely grosses me out. Of course, then there was LAST weekend, when we're driving home from Mittelbrunn, and the guy doesn't even bother to turn his back to the road.

That's right....I actually saw a guy, junk-in-hand, mid-stream. Like, I SAW THE GUY'S JUNK!

Blechhhh. I had nightmares about one-eyed snakes all night.

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